Oct 22, 2012

The pros and cons of living in a flood plain...

Pro - Fishing from a couch right in your living room.
Con - Your couch doesn't float.

Pro - The trip to the river just got shorter.
Con - Now you can't get away from it.

Pro - Driving boats through the neighbours' yards is cool.
Con - Dodging bullets for making waves in their kitchens.

Pro - Great time to wash your house's siding.
Con - Ring around the house.

Pro - Water-skiing in the street.
Con - Stop signs and cars are like land mines right under the surface.

Pro - Swim anywhere on hot days.
Con - Floating logs. Toilets can't flush and it's gotta go somewhere.

Pro - Sun-tanning on the roof is cool.
Con - Sleeping there sucks like an Electrolux.

Pro - Great way to meet new neighbours.
Con - Their junk keeps floating into your bedroom.

Pro - Washing dishes just got easier.
Con - All the grub is under water, too.

Pro - Good time to clean the gutters.
Con - Nothing else to do till the boat comes back.

Pro - Practice your diving skills.
Con - Breaking your neck on the top of the porch roof.

Pro - You can finally reach those dead branches.
Con - Gotta swim after the chain saw that's floating away.

Pro - You can finally slam dunk.
Con - You have to dive to the basket.

Pro - Finally meeting your e-mail friend, who floated over from the next county.
Con - She's forty years older, 200 pounds heavier, and a foot shorter than the picture she sent.

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